tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-61864462011-09-06T01:31:04.209-07:00Sex and DepressionAnonymous blog of a girl who has another blog but uses this blog to say the secret things she can't say there, about sex, about therapy, about manic depression. Franny is not her real name. And she's not sure why she's referring to herself in the third person. Probably part of the anonymity thing. Oh, and if you're under 18, get out.<br /><br />
Yahoo IM: frannyblog<br />
<a href=mailto:"frannyblog@yahoo.com">email</a>frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.comBlogger2511100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1098062902132285522004-10-17T18:27:00.000-07:002004-10-17T18:28:22.166-07:00i lost all the comments when changing templates. ah well. i have them all saved in a backup file for posterity.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1093838703049676572004-08-29T21:03:00.000-07:002004-08-30T06:10:01.183-07:00i thought i told hugh to stop drawing pictures of my snatch.
frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1087262309615372922004-06-14T18:17:00.000-07:002004-06-14T18:18:29.616-07:00he's so real he makes me feel fake. i don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1086182355515299642004-06-02T06:18:00.000-07:002004-06-02T06:19:15.516-07:00it was a caffeine and sugar rush, i figured it out. hadn't had either in a long time and it rioted my system.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1086008572671620092004-05-31T05:58:00.000-07:002004-05-31T06:02:52.670-07:00yesterday i got little work done because i could think of nothing but sex. it was beyond my control. it must be hormonal, biological, etc. every time i tried to concentrate i would soon realize my thoughts had wandered off to some elaborate fantasy involving cartoonists or some other object of desire. i tried everything i could to clear my head, but to no avail. but today it's better. hormones frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1085838795964328652004-05-29T06:53:00.000-07:002004-05-29T06:53:15.966-07:00he makes me blush...frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1085705830943353192004-05-27T17:54:00.000-07:002004-05-27T17:57:56.046-07:00i met a dreamy dreamy new boy, finally, after assuming there just weren't any more of them out there...and he's not an asshole! at least as far as i can tell...frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1085661109428870852004-05-27T05:31:00.000-07:002004-05-27T17:59:15.743-07:00looks like candida's been hacked.
UPDATE: it's been fixed. but where is she????frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1085596010457578142004-05-26T11:15:00.000-07:002004-05-28T06:59:27.870-07:00tony posted a honest bloggers-only quiz that i'm not going to take because politics isn't my thing but kitty bukkake created a honest bloggers-only quiz Kitty Bukkake addendum that is more my speed, although it may not be fair to answer it from an anonymous blog:
1. Do you try to look hot when you go to the grocery store just in case someone recognizes you from your blog? that hadn't occurred tofrannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1085495167293399212004-05-25T09:24:00.000-07:002004-05-25T13:05:52.733-07:00complain of no inspiration, and inspiration strikes.
i think the only thing worse than finding out your ex, the ex who still haunts your thoughts like it was yesterday, is seeing someone new, is to find out that he has a blog. and posts pictures. and she has a blog. and posts pictures. and a mutual friend of theirs has a blog. and posts pictures.
i hate the internet.
i hate everyone today. frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1085456552667857392004-05-24T20:41:00.000-07:002004-05-24T20:42:32.666-07:00franny has no more blog-crushes. thus, no blog-inspiration. frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1085457495743038442004-05-24T19:55:00.000-07:002004-05-24T20:58:15.743-07:00i can't stand people who are close to their families. well i can stand them, but only for a short while. and as long as they don't want me to meet them. i just can't relate to them, really. i get freaked out quickly. so any guy i date never has to worry about meeting the parents. they may meet eventually but it won't be my design.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1084369014712097612004-05-12T06:36:00.000-07:002004-05-12T06:36:54.713-07:00uh oh, tony fucked up his blog again. blogger for dummies? hmmm...frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1084236020139108982004-05-10T17:39:00.000-07:002004-05-10T17:40:20.140-07:00just thought i'd check in and see what all the fuss is about with the new blogger. it's pretty cool. but disorienting. and feels a little like blogger for dummies.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1083505049788546172004-05-02T06:37:00.000-07:002004-05-02T06:41:50.763-07:00today is the first day it was warm enough to sleep with the windows open and when i woke up the first thing i thought of was last summer, a summer of heat and sweat and loads of mammal sex with my ex. it was a summer relationship and i haven't missed him, but the breeze from the window this morning reminded me of him. i miss all that fucking. i miss waking up to him in this bed.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1083460628884690722004-05-01T18:17:00.000-07:002004-05-01T18:21:29.293-07:00i'm not dead. just not blogging for awhile.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1081015216323399352004-04-03T10:00:00.000-08:002004-04-03T12:12:52.590-08:00scientists: sex makes you smarter! maybe that's why i've been so uninspired on this blog lately...
via dazereader.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1081015066060424002004-04-03T09:57:00.000-08:002004-04-03T10:06:07.076-08:00i'm still MIA but also still here, if that makes any sense. in other words, don't depend on any regularity here! via dazereader, a nyt article on the horrifying 'girls gone wild' series notes that it is expanding to include a 'guys gone wild' series. they say the idea has "uncertain market appeal"--ha. while i'd definitely love to see more penises on-screen, i guess i'd have to see how it's done.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1080655071547791332004-03-30T05:57:00.000-08:002004-03-30T06:01:27.560-08:00funny how a brillant blogger starts taking medication and you watch as her posts get more and more happy and coherent and longer and... less interesting. but i'd rather see her happy, even if that means less entertainment for me.
no i'm not talking about me. frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1080654886528785092004-03-30T05:54:00.000-08:002004-03-30T05:58:22.543-08:00peeve: people who have no interest in getting to know you but then they learn what you do for a living and then they suddenly starty cozying up to you and offering their services. fuck you.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1080421491993185542004-03-29T13:04:00.000-08:002004-04-01T15:42:39.483-08:00MIA:
candida
creepy
liar
sam
frannyfrannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1080403487910764052004-03-27T08:04:00.000-08:002004-03-27T08:08:19.843-08:00it is unfortunate for this blog that the better my mood, the less material i have. but don't worry, if i can be counted on for anything it is to have recurring mood swings. i'll be back to posting about wanting to fuck cartoonists soon enough. am also working on a new erotic story that i'll post when finished. frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1080159253563472912004-03-24T12:14:00.000-08:002004-03-24T12:17:41.483-08:00funny how someone gives you a gift for just doing your job and you're thinking gee, this person must be excessively giving and positive or maybe just has a crush on me, but then they proceed to become such a work-related total pain in the ass that you then realize that your gift was pre-emptive compensation for the extended annoyance you are about to endure at their hands. frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1080154299459646802004-03-24T10:51:00.000-08:002004-03-24T10:55:07.576-08:00tony is so sweet to people on their birthdays. my birthday is in december, tony.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1080066643306779662004-03-23T10:30:00.000-08:002004-03-23T10:53:59.936-08:00
now there's some inspiration for me to write some more erotica...
...my absolute favorite moment of having sex with someone for the first time is the first spread of the knees, fully clothed, whether he does it with his hands or nudges with his thighs...
...though the first naked nudge is pretty great too...frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1080054226914767942004-03-23T07:03:00.000-08:002004-03-23T07:07:55.043-08:00i'm sick of my own voice and in one of those moods where i feel like never writing again, or at least not for a long long time. my blog-entries get shorter and less frequent... is it possible that i've said all i needed to say?frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1080047260471113432004-03-23T05:07:00.000-08:002004-03-23T05:11:06.716-08:00something's screwy with blogger, it lets me edit but not view my blog...can YOU see this?frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1080009342861194962004-03-22T18:35:00.000-08:002004-03-22T18:39:08.263-08:00i wonder what would happen if someone who had a blog died. how would its readers find out what happened? hugh disappeared for awhile and i wondered if he were dead in a ditch somewhere. sam's disappeared now too, and i wonder the same thing. if it's a well-known blog i suppose there would be ways for the news to get around easily, but for other blogs? i saw a blog once that hadn't been updated infrannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1080008741951562812004-03-22T18:25:00.000-08:002004-03-22T18:29:07.450-08:00my blog comes up #4 in a google search for "franny." yep, out of 91,900 results, i'm #4. right behind salinger's franny & zooey, franny billingsley, franny hall, and me. i'm pushin' for #1 though. frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079990874246210512004-03-22T13:27:00.000-08:002004-03-22T13:32:33.076-08:00i like tony cuz tony likes to share the love. link-love, that is. but i think he likes to share other kinds too. but it's all the same, right? love is love is love...frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079981475270865372004-03-22T10:51:00.000-08:002004-03-22T13:16:10.483-08:00
dunno what i think of this one. part of me thinks it sounds so so right, but another part of me says it's so, so wrong.
maybe it's cuz this is such a male way of doing things. not that it's wrong, just that it's male. and i am female.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079975574502610562004-03-22T09:12:00.000-08:002004-03-22T09:16:39.623-08:00right now the google ad up top for related searches is "depressed blogger." ha! wish i knew how to take a screen shot.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079849179080214772004-03-20T22:06:00.000-08:002004-03-20T22:09:42.216-08:00i was dragged to a hipster coffee house tonight and i must reluctantly admit that i had a fantastic time. the environment really is conducive to great conversation. nice big comfy couches and good coffee and good company and hours and hours of conversation uninterrupted by waitstaff looking to close their tabs and empty their seats. some guy sat alone a few couches away sketching. quite a few frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079808578998416292004-03-20T10:49:00.000-08:002004-03-20T11:30:16.170-08:00i had a female colleague giddy with laughter yesterday and i felt like such a male predator--humor is really a very predatory thing. you MAKE someone laugh. you get a control-based thrill from it. i even walked away while she was still giggling, satisfied with having conquered my prey. i'm usually very happy to be the giggly girl being worked over buy a funny guy, but more and more lately i'm frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079698204801221622004-03-19T04:10:00.000-08:002004-03-19T04:13:25.466-08:00as hugh points out in the comments to my previous post, belle de jour's been outed too. and just yesterday she posted something that seems to me clearly fake--written by an author and not a call girl:
"He stood, trousers off. I sat in a chair in front of him. My shirt (white, as requested) was half-unbuttoned. "I want to write my name in come all over you," he said.
I smirked. "You can't fool frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079635990092696492004-03-18T10:53:00.000-08:002004-03-18T10:56:29.950-08:00uh oh anonymous blogger creepy got busted. there's really only one person i would not want to find out about this blog...then again i also kinda want that person to find out about it, so i'll cross that bridge if and when i come to it. frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079635659520710912004-03-18T10:47:00.000-08:002004-03-18T10:50:58.840-08:00*giggle*
via dazereader.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079634884942813372004-03-18T10:34:00.000-08:002004-03-18T10:48:25.466-08:00
i'm hummin' baby.
frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079615567874235382004-03-18T05:12:00.000-08:002004-03-18T05:16:07.263-08:00thought the sickness was gone, but it was just hiding while setting up shop in my chest. damnit. *cough*frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079541374341412382004-03-17T08:36:00.000-08:002004-03-17T08:39:32.153-08:00For, while the tale of how we suffer,
and how we are delighted,
and how we may triumph is never new,
it must always be heard.
There isn't any other tale to tell,
it's the only light we've got in all this darkness.
-James Baldwinfrannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079532426679151582004-03-17T06:07:00.000-08:002004-03-17T06:10:24.746-08:00isn't it funny how sometimes you get obsessed with a certain issue and then you start seeing it everywhere? happens to everyone--whatever is your thing, you'll start seeing that thing. and i don't mean hallucinations or you putting your own emphasis on things, i mean things actually happening. my male friend who moved away who is now experiencing male asshole-ish-ness and extreme guilt over it frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079467354533016652004-03-16T12:02:00.000-08:002004-03-16T12:05:51.640-08:00mood lifter of the day: "that hair is a national treasure."frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079403694922120462004-03-15T18:21:00.000-08:002004-03-16T04:43:44.733-08:00tony's in trouble in the henhouse. i saw it comin' baby. reality always intrudes. as sure as death.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079361679506839922004-03-15T06:41:00.000-08:002004-03-15T06:44:34.403-08:00funny how things improve when you say to yourself 'i must USE this and not just FEEL it.' produce, produce, produce.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079353707737672122004-03-15T04:28:00.000-08:002004-03-15T04:31:42.780-08:00a swing of chemicals and you go from emotional philanthropist to vampire.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079353272553035192004-03-15T04:21:00.000-08:002004-03-15T04:24:27.670-08:00i'm not depressed because of any man, you moron. if you don't like my brain chemistry, go elsewhere.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079299757435040262004-03-14T13:29:00.000-08:002004-03-14T13:39:32.200-08:00when my friend killed himself last year he had first called a bunch of people to see if they could come over. none could. i'm sure none knew the urgency. i'm sure he didn't tell them the urgency. i'm sure he just said he wanted to hang out. but if they knew that he was going to kill himself if no one could come over, they surely would have done something. but you can't say to someone, "come over frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079294189958268982004-03-14T11:56:00.000-08:002004-03-14T11:59:44.403-08:00some people come here and comment mostly on the sex stuff. some comment mostly on the depression stuff. well we are in full depression mode at the moment, so sex-seekers should move on. won't be any o'that here for awhile. my fantasies lately have more to do with swift beheadings (mine) than with fucking. i guess i'm glad at least that the two aren't combined. frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079244477519090732004-03-13T22:07:00.000-08:002004-03-19T08:28:15.200-08:00it's fun to delete posts.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079242630220114582004-03-13T21:37:00.000-08:002004-03-13T21:42:09.170-08:00i need new friends. i sat around at a 'party' tonight attended by overeducated asshole hipsters in maryjanes and shag haircuts watching camp horror movies and making witty comments to the screen and trying to outdo each other and all i wanted to do was get the hell out of there and never go back. on the way out i said to my companion "that girl in the hot pink shirt and maryjanes was SO annoying.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079224246635426602004-03-13T16:30:00.000-08:002004-03-13T16:33:59.500-08:00first is meaningless, decadent. be first off the cliff, be my guest.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079218011967297382004-03-13T14:46:00.000-08:002004-03-13T15:00:43.640-08:00I would not sing you to sleep.
I would press my lips to your ear
and hope the terror in my heart stirs you.
--Reetika Vazirani, Lullaby
frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079147054178731772004-03-12T19:04:00.000-08:002004-03-12T19:07:26.200-08:00i'm sick. send soup. frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079045877912716382004-03-11T14:57:00.000-08:002004-03-11T15:03:35.076-08:00amen mika, i suck some to estee lauder every time they spam me. but the viagra and penis enlargement spammers are wasting their time on me, i shall not suck some.
ps you need to get comments on your blog.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079044492524940572004-03-11T14:34:00.000-08:002004-03-11T14:40:08.360-08:00amazing how sometimes things just drop out of the sky. woe is me woe is me and then *poof* a sudden invite to an expenses-paid weekend excursion that will involve airplanes and hotels and late nights and human people and heat and alcohol and festivity and performance and applause and maybe no time for blogging. dropped right in my fucking lap. my initial reaction is of course fear, panic, and "i frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079032518770273212004-03-11T11:15:00.000-08:002004-03-11T11:18:28.810-08:00the mailing of a manila envelope has broken me. three of them, actually. i sealed and posted and dropped them in the box. remembered i had forgotten to remove certain confidential names from the documents. ran back upstairs and grabbed the envelopes before the mailman had arrived. re-opened envelopes, removed names, re-sealed, re-sent. remembered i had forgotten to put in the all-important form. frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079011965424471892004-03-11T05:32:00.000-08:002004-03-11T05:35:54.903-08:00four engagements attended successfully yesterday: a good day. none of the engagements was particularly stressful or difficult, but they become very stressful and difficult because i talk myself in and out and in and out of going 6,496 times before attending each. i'm best at sudden engagements, where there is no time for thought.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1079011805190856722004-03-11T05:30:00.000-08:002004-03-11T05:33:15.343-08:00contender for post of the year:
"im sucha whore. i had this book thing that i was working on and it was all about being miserable and lame stuff like that and i thought no one wants to read that shit so then i thought i should just write about all the boys and girls i ever humped but then i started counting and realised how much a ho-bag i am and decided fuggit."frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078972770743665682004-03-10T18:39:00.000-08:002004-03-10T18:42:39.653-08:00i think i'm being baited. google referral o' the day: "franny gets fucked."
or maybe someone is just rooting for me.
frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078922302095618522004-03-10T04:38:00.000-08:002004-03-10T04:41:30.093-08:00i have only one friend i can say certain things to. if i say "yesterday i just wanted to be dead," she won't get concerned, she knows that coming from me that's like saying "yesterday i had a back ache." other friends would freak out. so i'd never say it to them. but sometimes i do feel that way, and sometimes i need to say it, and it's good to have someone who can hear it and know it and relate frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078867080379328182004-03-09T13:18:00.000-08:002004-03-09T13:21:07.763-08:00fuck being swept off my feet, i want someone to break down my fucking door.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078857372831635702004-03-09T10:36:00.000-08:002004-03-09T10:39:19.810-08:00he's baaaaack...
frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078800638408218212004-03-08T18:50:00.000-08:002004-03-08T18:53:44.296-08:00i cut back my therapy visits to twice a month rather than weekly. i think i've run out of things to say, and am bored with dicussing the same things. plus i think she's too much like me...she agrees with me on pretty much everything, and what good is that?frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078793600662171012004-03-08T16:53:00.000-08:002004-03-08T16:56:26.390-08:00the spammers keep urging me to "get a larger penis" and "meet beautiful women in your city." perhaps i should consider these as an alternative.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078792231485863642004-03-08T16:30:00.000-08:002004-03-08T16:33:37.513-08:00some people are very smart to not have comments on their blogs, i'd tear their worthless asses up.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078758000272871262004-03-08T07:00:00.000-08:002004-03-08T09:28:58.670-08:00girl blogger has a crush on me.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078748004218492932004-03-08T04:13:00.000-08:002004-03-08T04:16:29.826-08:00where's hugh? why is his blog fucked up?frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078663884175096112004-03-07T04:51:00.000-08:002004-03-07T09:17:05.670-08:00got an obscene phone call last night. actually an obscene voicemail left at around 3am. just a guy moaning. and pretty clearly fake. i know cuz i listened to it three times. the first time it was scary and fascinating to hear some strange man moaning into my phone. the second time it was a little sad. the third time it was funny, and i detected the start of laughter in the last millisecond of thefrannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078620701304307972004-03-06T16:51:00.000-08:002004-03-07T05:41:50.170-08:00what is it about getting an out-of-the-blue email from a verrrrry well-known blogger whom you've never interacted with that is so exciting?
it's like blogs are a separate universe with its own stars, and where you can actually interact with those stars one on one. perhaps it's because there's more control involved...in real life sean penn is hounded by paparazzi so he avoids the public, but if frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078618867284392962004-03-06T16:21:00.000-08:002004-03-06T16:24:10.700-08:00why is it that the one thing that attracts me most to a person also always ends up being the one thing the repulses me most about them?frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078533466057746432004-03-05T16:37:00.000-08:002004-03-05T17:45:44.606-08:00HOMAGE
what a gapingvoid cartoon would look like if drawn by me:
(if the image isn't showing up, go here .)
those are girl-curlicues rather than squigglys. yes i have no drawing skills. and bad handwriting. find the real thing here.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078515448064812772004-03-05T11:37:00.000-08:002004-03-07T09:39:52.390-08:00a discussion on anonymity that scares me a little.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078454230482400072004-03-04T18:37:00.000-08:002004-03-04T18:40:11.200-08:00from the files of overly dramatic poetry that perfectly captures my current mood:
All fled, all done, so lift me on the pyre;
The feast is over and the lamps expire.
--robert e. howardfrannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078358032184824342004-03-03T15:53:00.000-08:002004-03-04T07:18:45.950-08:00in the movie sylvia there is the scene of the first meeting of the two poets, she seeking him out at a party after reading his poems. it all happens in public, at a party, all words, but i found it to be highly erotic. she walks in all aglow and demands "where is he?" and then marches up to him and tells him she read his poems, that they were "the real thing, not blubbery baby stuff like the frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078353229628755282004-03-03T14:33:00.000-08:002004-03-03T14:36:48.640-08:00i'd love to talk to you, baby, but i'm afraid you'd break my heart.
i've discovered the sugar high--who needs caffeine. i'm not much of a sugar-eater but was trapped somewhere today with only a box of cookies for fuel, and i was bouncing off the fucking walls. have never been so productive. and aroused. i walked home. now i'm waiting for the crash...frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078332552214594572004-03-03T08:49:00.000-08:002004-03-03T08:52:40.246-08:00"well known fact that the crazier the girl the better the sex"
(google referral to my site)
welcome!frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-107828561285409212004-03-02T19:46:00.000-08:002004-03-10T05:37:12.420-08:00"there is this extreme physical need, every day immediately upon waking and lasting until I finally get to sleep, to sink my aroused phallus up inside some female flesh..." --someone else's blog, via sam.
after a certain age (28, i'd say, but it is a slow build from 25 and i hear it goes well through the late 30s) women have that same physical need, to be that piece of flesh that sucks an frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078254647539459692004-03-02T11:10:00.000-08:002004-03-02T19:20:22.030-08:00
i was standing in a circle of four. i had been watching him all night. but now i was close. across from me he was looking down as someone spoke. he lifted his eyes slowly, with the look of someone who thought he would be looking unnoticed. he found me looking directly at him. his eyes flicked away and he turned to the left and caught his breath, pausing, then re-starting a dead conversation in frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078231953495300132004-03-02T04:52:00.000-08:002004-03-02T04:55:30.293-08:00fortune cookie: "discontent is the first step in the progress of a man or a nation."frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078194230337217392004-03-01T18:23:00.000-08:002004-03-01T18:28:14.733-08:00god bless evan daze. where does he find this stuff? and this stuff?frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078192365923441332004-03-01T17:52:00.000-08:002004-03-01T17:55:42.106-08:00ms. fine wants me to post my poem--that one's going out under my real name, but i'll post a different one:
awakened, softly, his hand on my breast.
slow smile spreads, sleepy.
i curl in closer, still waking.
beckoned from dreaming,
floating between.
on my neck the scratch
of his morning whiskers,
his lips find my ear.
hot, moist, rousing from dreams.
dreams of…what…what need for dreamsfrannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078163808130646162004-03-01T09:56:00.000-08:002004-03-01T10:00:02.796-08:00tony thinks i'm a rapscallion.
*giggle*frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078159160671073972004-03-01T08:39:00.000-08:002004-03-01T17:56:31.436-08:00the sun and spring air actually cheered me today! (exclamation points are a lie. they are so garish, they need to create a piece of punctuation that lies somewhere between ! and . )frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078144822770538522004-03-01T04:40:00.000-08:002004-03-01T04:43:18.373-08:00off to work today...i don't wanna go but i'm glad to have to. i'm entirely too satisifed to stay alone in my house for days at a stretch.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078096968666273052004-02-29T15:22:00.000-08:002004-02-29T15:25:43.733-08:00did indeed birth a poem. must sit on it though. my tendency is to send it off immediately and then a day later think of a perfect word that would fit in the perfect slot but it's too late, it's gone, immature and unready to withstand outside eyes. and yes i realize 'unready' is not really a word.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1078078730068798492004-02-29T10:18:00.000-08:002004-03-01T07:06:14.513-08:00i'm sorry, i forgot about my rule against linking to evil people.
sometimes i wonder, did his cruelty help me by pushing me over the edge and sending me so low that i was forced to seek help? or did it destroy me (for selfsame reason)?frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1077923441042599092004-02-27T15:10:00.000-08:002004-02-27T15:16:18.030-08:00the longing was gone for awhile but now it's back. i think i might birth a poem. or write a dirty "romance" story.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1077913919731815332004-02-27T12:31:00.000-08:002004-02-27T12:34:51.890-08:00i need a li'l affection tonight. unfortunately i have no supply of that closeby. would be nice to have a steady source, a lite version of the booty call--"hi. can i come snuggle with you?"frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1077835941287184122004-02-26T14:52:00.000-08:002004-02-26T14:55:11.763-08:00hmmm...i guess one could say snoopy is manic depressive...
You are Snoopy!
Which Peanuts Character are You? brought to you by Quizilla
frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1077819887822961762004-02-26T10:24:00.000-08:002004-02-26T10:27:38.546-08:00coffee was a bad idea today. anxiety + caffeine = panic.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1077815450591085162004-02-26T09:10:00.000-08:002004-02-26T09:22:26.466-08:00it's one of those days when you have big plans first thing in the morning and then one little thing goes wrong, then another, than another, and the minor ruptures piled atop each other add up to the end of the world. when really, not a single thing is different than it was 12 hours ago. it's one of those days when i don't want to be here or there or anywhere.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1077808676088456832004-02-26T07:17:00.000-08:002004-02-26T07:21:00.200-08:00dilemma: do i tell the therapist about this site? i think it would be a therapist's dream. but it would probably ruin the site. i'd never post again. nah, don't tell her. instead, quit therapy.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1077737005147590972004-02-25T11:23:00.000-08:002004-02-25T11:26:14.576-08:00
eerie...i was just thinking about whether i wanted to post something about someone who may or may not know that he had a life-changing effect on me and who now sees me as an enemy...or perhaps just as irrelevant...anyway the post was to have included the following:
"every word is about you. even when it's not about you, it's about you."
and then i came across the above cartoon.
frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1077718987587299002004-02-25T06:23:00.000-08:002004-02-25T06:25:56.640-08:00today it is the dramatic battle between what i should do and what i want to do. therapy skills have taught me that despite what i want to do, i need to do what i should do, because if i neglect what i should do in favor of what i want, i will only be satisfying the short-term and in the long term will be making things worse. but if i do what i should and not what i want, i will sacrifice shallow frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1077711827822494402004-02-25T04:23:00.000-08:002004-02-25T04:26:36.746-08:00uh oh comments are down. i'll get no fix today.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1077682406622500712004-02-24T20:13:00.000-08:002004-02-24T20:16:15.233-08:00if you think i'm a badass you're wrong. high threshold for pain/depression/chaos plus emotional exhaustion and withdrawal does not equal zen spunk. it equals "i will never feel that humiliation again. i will never feel anything again."
but then you probably never thought i was a badass.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1077682115785026742004-02-24T20:08:00.000-08:002004-02-24T20:11:24.450-08:00smooth sailing and little blogging for awhile, then memory of a suicide jogs it all.frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1077682078245248412004-02-24T20:07:00.000-08:002004-02-24T20:22:05.246-08:00i was a very troubled and very lonely girl with a broken heart, an overactive imagination and a dramatic streak.
he was a very troubled and very lonely boy with a broken heart, an overactive imagination and a cruel streak.
nuclear mutual freakout disaster waiting to happen.
frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1077680798521686852004-02-24T19:46:00.000-08:002004-02-27T12:35:29.060-08:00but 'better than chocolate' is just about the lamest movie i've ever seen. even my friend would've agreed. frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6186446.post-1077680466813714052004-02-24T19:41:00.000-08:002004-02-24T20:08:40.110-08:00the previous post got me thinking that the sum of the parts of 2003 should make it the worst year of my life: suicide of a friend, horrible mental cruelty at the hands of a guy i was crazy for, bust-up with a close female friend i haven't spoken to since she moved to another city, two other close friends moved away to other cities.
yet somehow i've never thought of it as the worst year of my frannyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15436062790020122968noreply@blogger.com0